I'm Fine.

I have died every second I've been alive
Every minute I breathe, I wish I had died
Every time I wake up, I want to sleep again
And dream of you before the truth shows its face again
I live in the dark because you put me here
You used me, left me, now refuse to hear me speak
Well I'm speaking out to myself, right here, right now
I know well by now I'm not worth your affection
Or anyone's, but hey, at least they aren't paying any attention
At least I can disappear in a different direction
No one notices a shadow girl, slowly dying
Now one hears me in my world, silently crying
I can starve all my lonesome self
I don't even need your help
You broke me, hurt me
Raped me, killed me
But I can't die again, I'm the undead
I am inside the words that you said
I am the memory burning inside your head
And I hate you with each passing breath
But I love you at the same time
And I'll lie on my back and pretend it's all fine
I'll look at Death's eyes and you'll look at mine
And see the nothing that reflects my soul
Empty, broken, missing; you stole
My spirit, the fire in my eyes
It burned so hot, but I didn't set fire
Except with my blade, my only desire
Is to feel, to know if I'm dead yet
Or if I can drink enough to forget
Can I take enough pills to be numb to what I let
Happen? And what about the food I reject?
And the little I eat but then go and vomit?
Or the nights where I sit in the dirt
Crying, replaying the times you hurt me
I get I'm not beautiful, okay?
I get that I'm hideous, every day
I understand I need makeup to cover what I say
I need to stick to my lies
I never cry
I don't need you, I'm fine
I'm fine.