It's A Miracle

I'm waiting for you to notice
I drink every day, it's
Not as entertainment, it's
To numb the pain, forget what he did, it's
Been haunting me ever since
That night, I just want you to care
This isn't who I was back there
This new me, I hate her too
Always has a drink in hand, you
Have yet to notice the juice
Mixed with vodka, you
Must be blinder than you used
To be, your eyesight must be failing you
Because Monster's not yellow
And I've never been mellow
Idiot, you can't hear me bellow
My need for help, though I scream
In my head
Out loud I said
"Help me now"
I can't even scream, this silence is so loud
I miss being at home in the cloud
I only came down because I saw your frown
Disappointment evident in your face
Yet you hurt me, forgot my name?
Who am I, love? Who is this?
This girl cowering under blankets like some pathetic bitch
Who can't even be honest for fear of your hits
You're breaking what's already broken
Saying things better left unspoken
As the ground sways
The alcohol blurs my days
Look at me, the girl you made
Burned, no one wants me
No one will believe me
You fucking killed me
And I'm not even dead
After everything you said,
It's a miracle, eh?